Thursday, August 12, 2021

 (Backstory of Ha'Penny Annie AKA Madame Veruca)

 Once they almost stayed an entire year, but, no matter how long they stayed, invariably her mother would pull up stakes and together, just the two of them, would move under the cover of night to a new village.  Usually, it followed the same pattern.  Her mother would set up shop as a traveling occultist whose "gift" was being able to contact the spirit world.  She called herself Madame Veruca and by invoking the spirits of the dead in seances or having the clientele peform nightly rituals in graveyards she would provide the answers sought.  Her marks always walked away a bit lighter, both in spirit and in their pockets.  During these residencies, Annie was told to stay indoors and only appeared to the customers in a heavy black veil or in the guise of the recently dead evoked through judicious amounts of greasepaint and well-practiced mummery.  That was how it started.  That was not how it ended.  Over time, her mother would have sleepless nights, starting upright shaking and sweat covered and calling out to unseen presences as if they were right beside her.  Presences that Annie never saw.  Her mother's health declined precipitously, eyes hollow and skin drawn beneath her make up.  On the eve of each departure, her mother would exclaim, "Too many have found me!  Too many!  So so many!"  So it began again on the next night in a new bed, in a new town.

One final evening, Annie was awakened by the sound of shutters slamming shut from a ferocious storm outside their hovel.  She looked about and her mother was nowhere to be seen.  Instead a note was pinned to the summoning board by the point of the divining planchette driven deep into the wood.  

It read:
     "My dearest,
I can avoid them no longer!  They have begun to follow me from town to town where they had not before!  They even wait for me when I arrive!  Always their voices pleading...  Always their eyes staring...   Looking for answers I do not have.  I cannot escape them to a new life and we know no afterlife waits for us, my darling, just the mists that are our prison.  I am weak.  Forgive me I pray!  But I have found a way!  The Devourer can grant me the blackness!  The nothingness!  I will not be!
     Do not seek me out!
     And if the boy knocks, do not answer the door!"

Annie cried until she could cry no more.  In the morning, she gathered their remaining belongings and began the journey to a new town.  This time she traveled at dawn and that evening in a new place she wore the face of Madame Veruca.

For years, she plied the trade her mother had taught her so well.  She traded hope for comforting lies and the few coins the villagers could spare.  While it was not a good life, it was still a life.  Until the night it became less than that.

On that night shortly after Annie had sent the rubes on their way, back into chill night and back to their undistinguished lives, a small knock was heard at the door.  Exasperated, Annie hastily threw back on the face of Madame Veruca and swung wide the door expecting to see one of the townsfolk inquiring about a forgotten question.  Instead only the blackness of the night greeted her, but when she turned back to the comfort of her small fire she saw a child-like figure was sitting before the hearth.  It's rag-covered legs swinging back and forth beneath the stool.  It's bare feet uninjured but bloody.  Dripping blood, drop by drop on to the flagstones.  And upon its head a stove pipe hat of ridiculous proportions for a child so small sat askew upon its pate like a sad crown.

With a shudder, Annie recognized this figure, because while she had never seen him before, she recalled the description told by her mother so long ago.  This was Bonnie Pete, her mother's spirit guide!  During each seance she would reach out to the ether and beg the aid of Bonnie Pete to to bring her to the spirits she sought.  Until this very moment, Annie believed that the personage of Bonnie Pete was a creature woven out of whole cloth.  A charade for the sheep who they sought to fleece and not something truly of this world or the next. 

With shaking voice Annie inquired, "Bonnie Pete?  If that you be... Have you come to guide me to the spirits as you have  guided my mother before me?"

The child's grin remained motionless and fixed and yet the child laughed.
    
 "No.  I have come to keep them from you."
_________________________________________________
(Ha'Penny Annie is a travelling fortune teller who has picked up some skills in bardcraft to weave her illusions.  She is of Vistani blood and was raised among them as a small child until her mother parted from the tribe to travel through the mists plying her trade.  After her mother left, Annie took up with The Carnival as one of their mediums on the midway.  While she is young, she travels clad as an old crone decked with the peasant finery and trinkets of one touched by the spiritworld.  She seeks a way to grant peace or passage to the spirits that assail her as she has the Dark Gift: Gathered Whispers.)

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Aeranha and Chronotized Aeranha ("Time Sharks") are ferocious flying predators related to the mundane breed of fish known as piranha.  Slightly larger then their non-magical kin, they are transparent,  fly in schools that inhabit cloud banks above the Amazon Basin and never spend time in the water or on land .  Aeranha are attracted to and feed on mana.  They can subsist by maintaining close proximity above a leyline but they are driven into feeding frenzies by magical creatures or persons that travel too close  within their range of scent.  A large enough school has been known to drop the picked-clean bones of a juvenile dragon from the sky.  They present a particular hazard to Magimundi citizens who travel through their aerial hunting grounds not only due to their numbers and speed, but also due to the soporific venom their bite injects.  In sufficient quantities they can put even the largest predator to sleep.   Furthermore, their unique bond with time grants them the ability to "phase" through solid objects and protective garments as well as giving them the ability to "blink" which renders them particularly elusive.   The life cycle of an aeranha begins in the intersticial spaces of the time stream itself where their eggs are laid.  When the eggs hatch, the juvenile aeranha are born into our reality where they grow to maturity.   Aeranha ultimately enter a final stage of maturity where they re-enter the time stream and swim upstream to spawn.  These chonotized aeranha spend the remainder of their lives within the time stream.   During this chronotized phase of their existence, they become even more aggressive, are no longer constrained to certain geographical hunting grounds, and are drawn to disturbances or alterations anywhere in the time stream.  They are the prime hazard of time travel and the sole reason why major time alterations are unheard of.  

"Those who seek to change history have a date with an Aeranha."

Friday, July 24, 2015

SADIE DOYLE New York Comic Con WISH LIST

So some time back the Thrilling Adventure Hour put up this absolutely marvelous Youtube video of Paget Brewster reading a list of favorite dogs as her character from Beyond Belief, Sadie Doyle.  It was received with much acclaim and there was a promise of more lists to come.  Alas, to date, no further lists have appeared.

With that said, I thought to myself, "Self? Isn't Paget going to be in New York during the upcoming Comic Con in October?  If so, might she not also be at a Thrilling Adventure Hour Q & A?"  Self, did not answer.  He's a bit of a killjoy.  I did muse though about trying to ask a question at the panel inquiring whether the talented Ms. Brewster might be willing to read a list of geek genre character names perhaps composed by her table mates while the panel was ongoing and to be read at the end.

I subsequently realized that this might put her on the spot and having no wish to do that, I thought better of the idea and instead will present my WISH LIST for Sadie Doyle here.  In the hopes that she might grace us with a reading or perhaps read a list prepared by the eminent Acker & Blacker for the occasion.

(I picked three characters each from DC comics, Marvel Comics, Harry Potter, Star Wars and Star Trek.  In no particular order of preference.)



Big Barda 

Mr. Mxyzptlk

The Penguin

Squirrel Girl

Spider-Gwen

Mental Organism Designed Only for Killing

Neville Longbottom

He-Who-Must-Not-be-Named

Cho Chang

Padme Amidala

Chewbacca

Wedge Antilles

Ensign Pavel Chekov

Spock

Khan Noonien Singh




Thursday, May 28, 2015

Nigel's Tome of Ill-Advised Spellcraft.


ANTI-SPELL CASTING

To protect from magics here, at this present time,
Make my enemies before me unable to rhyme!

BANISH

By arcane oath and eldritch spell
Banish my enemies now to Hell!

BLIND

Offending creatures who seek to hinder our plight.
I remove from my enemies the gift of sight!

BONES TO JELLY

My enemies now melt, much more than kneel,
Their bones liquify and their blood congeal!

CHARM

Before we find ourselves in early graves,
Make these creatures my obedient slaves!

COMMUNE

I commune with gods above in circumstances dreary,
May they take pity and answer the following query!

COMPELL TRUTH

By white arts, these foes shall be ensorcelled and spelled,
To speak naught but the truth they shall now be compelled!

DAMAGE REFLECTION

We take no damage to our body, limb or head,
Reflect the damage back to the attacker instead!

DANCE OF DEATH

Hear me!  Lords of the Dance!  Possess feet, heels and toes!
An unstoppable dance be the death of my foes!

DEATH RAY

At will as I point at foes, in truth,
From my fingertip a death ray will shoot!

DETECT MAGIC

The point of my weapon will detect magic around,
Power sensed increasing the speed of a beeping sound!

DETECT TRAPS

To avoid death or injury by clumsy lapse.
I cast a spell before us to detect all traps!

DISPELL UNDEAD

Foul semblance of life!  Desist and cease!
As I send thy souls to eternal peace!

ENCHANT WEAPON

To enable us to strike our foes, I invoke and incant,
Transmute our weapons to silver and with magicks enchant!

ENLARGE

With proportional strength my party now grows,
Until as giants we tower over our foes!

FEAR

All who try to attack or approach me here.
Will now flee 'til exhausted from abject fear!

FIREBALL

A ball of flame against my foe.
A fireball infernal I now throw!

FLESH TO STONE

The medusa's touch on flesh and bone
All who meet my gaze be turned to stone!

FLIGHT

To myself and party within my sight
I grant the power of controllable flight!

GROIN PULL

You will rue the day!  Will regret you'll be full!

As I inflict you now with a painful groin pull!

HEAL

In perfect health we will feel
When my party I do heal!

HEAT/COLD WARD

Neither the cold's frozen grip nor burning touch of fire!
I ward from these extremes in this situation most dire!

HOLD MONSTER

Stopped in mid-stride and frozen in place.
Forces unseen hold my foes in this space!

IDENTIFY

Identify this artifact here before us
Tell us what it does by godly chorus!

IMMUNE TO HARM

By the aid and power of this charm
I render my party immune to harm!

IMPLODING HEADS

I relieve my foes of a worrisome load,
As I cause their heads to painfully implode!

INVISIBILITY

I render my party invisible to sight and smell
Except, of course, to each other by means of this spell!

LIGHT

To throw back the darkness and its black blight,
My weapon shall shine forth with holy light!

LIGHTNING BOLT

I harness the powers of the storm and the sky,
Against my enemies let lightning fly!

MONSTERS TO BUNNIES

I transmogrify my foes into shapes not the norm,
Instead into lovable bunnies they now will transform!

NEUTRALIZE POISON

To cleanse the blood I recite this spell by rote
And neutralize poison with arcane antidote!

NIPPLE RINGS TO SILVER

Silver is deadly to wearbears.  It is the truth.
So to silver their nipple rings, I now transmute!

PROTECTION FROM EVIL

From evil's grasp we shall be safe and such.
A ward I cast so that they cannot touch!

RAISE DEAD

Return to the world of mortal strike!
My party members return to life!

REGENERATE

Bones knit and flesh regrow in direst of straits
From part to whole my party regenerates!

REINCARNATE

Return dead fallen to thy comrade's side!
Reincarnate as <insert race or creature> and living bide!

REMOVE CURSE

By eldritch invocation clipped and terse
I weave a spell to remove this curse!

REPEL

Myself and my party I now surround,
With a force field to make all foes rebound!

REVERSE GRAVITY

I free my foes from gravity's grip, without a trace.
Untied to this earthly sphere, watch them fly into space!

REVERSE TIME

A do-over is needed so hear my rhyme
To start this scene over, I now reverse time!

SHRINK

I shrink all my foes within my sight
Until they are only ten inches in height!

SILENCE

Against the foul effects of sound I have conferred
Protections so that harmful sounds will not be heard!

SINK

Here's an arcane spell to confuse and vex,
Sink these creatures in the ground up to their necks!

SLOW

I cast a curse against my foe
To make them move ten times as slow!

STONE TO FLESH

Blood flow once more, hearts beat in breast!
Transform these victims from stone to flesh!

STRENGTH

I win I shall go to any length,
I now grant my party giant strength!

SUMMON GUARDIAN

A stalwart hero's call!  Both fortune and fame!
I summon <insert name>, Guardian of the Flame!

SUMMON ITEMS

Powers benevolent hear my voice!  Head my plea!
I safely summon <insert item(s)> here before me!

TELEPORT (chasm)

To the other side of this gap on solid ground
After teleporting my party will now be found!

TELEPORT (location)

I teleport us all, whole and intact
To <insert location> and that's a fact!

TIME STOP

Except for me, time stops for foe and friend,
Until I choose to yell, 'TIME IN," again!

TONGUES

All gathered here will understand and speak
Each others language and communication seek!

WATERBREATHING

Not only air can sustain us but waters that seep,
We can breathe in the depths of the watery deep!

WEAKNESS

I defeat my foes in a thrice with a snap,
As from their limbs all their strength I now sap!

WISH (restore party)

I wish all my party to be here at my behest
Hale and hearty as they were at the start of this quest!

X-RAY VISION

Many chests contain traps which I cannot abide
X-ray vision will let me see safely inside!